Love yourself and learn to live!

I'm a non-smoker ... now.

The first cigarette I ever tried was not long before my 12th birthday.  I had just moved to Perth with my family and had found a group of neighbourhood kids to hang around with.

This particular day, one of the kids said that he had something to show us, so we all followed him behind a shed in one of their back yards.  All very secretive and hushing each other as we tiptoed down the drive way, past the house where one of their mothers was baking in the kitchen.  When we arrived at the desired location, the boy slipped a brand new, sealed packet of Marlboro Reds out of his pocket.

We all gasped in admiration.  He had taken it from a carton of cigarettes which was supposedly hidden in his father's back yard work shed. It was the only place that his mother would allow his father to smoke because she didn't like the smell.

Then the boy pulled out a box of redhead matches from his other pocket.  More gasps followed.

At this point, I still had no idea that the aim of this game was for us all to smoke a cigarette.  My only experience with kids and matches, was when my neighbour's son, in the last house that I lived in, played with matches in a wardrobe and consequently burnt their house down.  To me, matches were dangerous!  I was nervously looking around us at what could catch fire and whether the house was far enough away that it was safe.

The boy unwrapped the packet.  There were 20 in the pack and there were 7 of us.  He emptied the packet onto the ground and handed each of us a cigarette.  Then we had to figure out who was going first.  We all agreed that because he had brought the cigarettes, he should light up first.  This was a huge relief to me because I was dreading my turn, and with hindsight, I think the other kids were too!

Our ages probably ranged from about 10 to 13 and the boy with the cigarettes was the oldest.  He put the cigarette into his mouth, struck the match and lifted it to the cigarette end.  It glowed orange as he sucked the flame onto it and he coughed a huge puff of smoke out of his mouth.  It smelled bad.  He whispered 'hmmm smooooth' (Seriously! He was mimicking the ad on TV!).

I have stronger memories about that boy's first puff of a cigarette than I have about my own.  I remember that it tasted bad, but we all finished our cigarettes that day and after that, every week, he would steal a packet of cigarettes and we would all have to smoke one behind the shed.  I don't remember how long we did that for, but by the time I was 13, I was stealing packets of cigarettes out of my own parent's cartons.

We had moved by then, into a new housing estate, so it was with a new group of friends that I hid inside houses in various stages of construction to smoke our cigarettes.

One day, when none of us were able to acquire any, I was feeling particularly brave and I dared to ask my mother if I could have a drag of her cigarette.  She didn't miss a beat.  She handed it to me saying 'as long as you smoke it properly.  You breathe the smoke in.'  By this stage, I had been smoking for long enough that I was a pro!

I sucked in the smoke and as I blew it out, she responded with  'ok you can have 3 cigarettes a day, but you have to promise me that you will only smoke inside your own home.  I don't want to catch you smoking outside!'

So that was my introduction to a 37 year smoking habit.

I attempted and failed to quit through all of my pregnancies.  It was my over active thyroid and subsequent visit to a naturopath in March 2008 that prompted me to quit.  I read a book called 'Allen Carr's Easy Way to Stop Smoking' and it took 2 attempts with the book, but I did it!

Three years next month and I feel better than ever.  I played a lot of sports in my time and never realised that my struggling and gasping for breath was from smoking.  I believed that everybody felt that way when they ran, swam or played hard.  It's only now, at the age of 50, that I can play a full hour of tennis and never feel short of breath and never have to gasp for air.

It's amazing!  The frustrating thing is that smokers are so addicted that they can't understand how good it is to not smoke.  They say that they enjoy it and don't want to give up but after you give it up, you realise what a big fat lie that is.

To all of those smokers out there - two of my grown children included - learn how to live smoke free.  It's much better than you can ever imagine, to be a non-smoker.

Two things I do know for certain.  You can't do it unless you want to do it.  You can't do it for anyone but yourself.

Love yourself and learn to live.